Today as I was watering my plants I thought about you, single moms, and your children. Not every plant grows in the same way. Some plants want morning light, so I place those in my east-facing windows. Although other plants that prefer more intense light will find themselves in my west or south windows. You have to find the perfect spot for your plant to really thrive. Sometimes I have to move my plants around for a while until I find the perfect spot. I find a lot of joy in growing plants. I’ve also found some great parenting truths while paying attention to my plants. My boys require different spots to grow as well. If I treated both the same, it would hurt all of us.
One of my boys is very similar to my east-window plants. He is a morning person. He needs me to be gentle and pay close attention to what he needs because most of the time he is oblivious to his own needs. I could place my other boy in just about any window and he would find a way to get what he needs. One is not better, or even easier; they are just different.
We must pay close attention to our children and find their “spot” in all areas of their lives.
Where are they able to grow emotionally? Maybe your child is like my oldest and you need to take them on long car rides with the music off to get them to talk. He needs a place where he doesn’t have to look me in the eyes and can look out the window as we talk. For whatever reason, he can express himself in this setting. This is his spot.
Where are they able to grow spiritually? Maybe your child is like my youngest and you need to create a safe place for them to ask difficult questions. For him, we have to be doing something active for this certain place to feel safe. So, we throw a baseball back and forth and I let him ask me anything. In return, I ask him questions. He thrives in this moment. My oldest would rather me take him to the dentist than throw a baseball around and ask each other difficult questions! But for my little guy, the backyard is his spot to find and discover the mysteries of God.
Where are they able to grow intellectually? This one can be tricky because you’re often confined by the location you live. I’ve found it incredibly important to find an outlet for my oldest to thrive in this area. He is dyslexic and struggles in the traditional school environment. The best academic decision we ever made was to explore trade school once he was in high school. He began to thrive and grow in ways I never imagined. We found his spot!
I hope this post encourages you to consider where your child’s spot may be. It’s easy to assume they grow where we grow. But maybe they need a different window, with a different view, with a different amount of light and water and space. Here’s to finding the right spot for your children to grow in all the wonderful areas!
About Mel Hiett
Hi friends, I’m Mel Hiett. I like to believe that my nine years of being a single mom to two rowdy boys helped prepare me for Arise MInistries. Just in case raising those two wild boys wasn’t enough training God allowed me to work with teenagers in the local church for sixteen years. If nothing else I have a handful of wild stories and God moments to share with all of you. My husband Trae and I decided to make life more interesting in 2017 when we got married. Together we have five children, two dogs, and some chickens. We have a family group text affectionately named “The Zoo”. Please feel free to follow my adventures on Facebook or Instagram @themelymel.